Infertility, IVF, and Emotional Pressure in Indian Families — Dr. Vinoad Bharrati’s Perspective

In India, I often see how deeply marriage is tied to the expectation of parenthood. No matter the couple’s age, society treats the years after marriage as a countdown to having a child. This creates tremendous emotional pressure—especially in joint families, where women are frequently subjected to intrusive questions, judgement, and unspoken comparisons. For many, the belief that a marriage is “complete” only after childbirth remains deeply rooted across generations.

As a gynaecologist, I witness not only the medical side of infertility but also the emotional trauma couples endure because of social expectations. Sadly, infertility is still seen as a personal failure in many Indian households. Whether in urban or rural settings, older generations often connect their own identity and fulfillment with becoming grandparents. As a result, couples—particularly women—face blame, guilt, and social stigma when conception does not happen naturally.

The Silent Struggles Couples Face During IVF

In my practice, couples undergoing IVF commonly share struggles such as:

• Social isolation and feeling “left out”
• Unwanted or unscientific advice from relatives
• Blame and pressure, disproportionately directed at women
• Comparisons with friends or cousins who conceived earlier
• Statements like “just relax” or “have faith,” which minimize their struggle

These emotional burdens often make the IVF journey even more challenging than the medical process itself.

How Couples Can Cope Better — My Guidance

Over the years, I guide couples to protect their emotional health while navigating fertility challenges:

1. Create a judgment-free emotional space
Speak openly with your partner. Support each other without criticism or fear.

2. Decide what and how much to share with family
You are not obligated to disclose every detail.

3. Set healthy boundaries — politely but firmly
A simple reply like, “We’re working on it and will share when the time is right,” can reduce unnecessary pressure.

4. Educate family when possible
Many concerns stem from lack of awareness. I encourage couples to explain that IVF is a medical solution, not a failure.

5. Seek professional counselling
Fertility counselling helps manage stress, expectations, and emotional fatigue. At Rising Medicare Hospital and Elite Momz, we provide this support as part of IVF care.

6. Join a support network
Connecting with other couples helps normalize the journey and reduces emotional isolation.

7. Take care of your mental well-being
Gentle exercise, meditation, journaling, and occasional breaks from fertility-focused conversations make a big difference.

Rewriting the Narrative Around IVF

IVF is not a reflection of weakness—it is a powerful step forward.
It is courage. It is resilience.
It is hope.

You are not “less” for choosing IVF.
You are choosing a scientifically supported path toward parenthood.

In my view, infertility and IVF are not only medical conditions; they are deeply emotional experiences, shaped by cultural expectations. When couples receive compassion, understanding, and emotional support—both from their families and society—the journey becomes far less burdensome.

My hope is that with greater awareness, we shift from judgment to empathy, from stigma to acceptance, and from silence to open conversations.
IVF is not the end—
It is a new beginning filled with hope and possibility.